As Labor Day approaches, many of us are trying to get in those essential summer activities before it is too late: Shakespeare in the Park, time at the beach, brunch with friends outside, and for the heroin addict who sometimes crashes in the construction site next door, taking a dump on my building.

This summer's Herr Dooker seems to be even more advanced than last year's sly crapping. The bowel bandit has moved from simply crapping during daylight hours in a fairly open area to firing off his rear exhaust on the service door right at ass height. This gives it a nice cascading effect.

We have an action shot of George cleaning it off, and a little song I am writing to commemorate the occasion (sung to the tune of Creedence Clearwater Revival's Lookin' Out My Back Door [2:32]).

Leavin' for work in corduroys, check the side door, oh boy!

George is spraying at something, he got it all watered down
Odor takes my nose for a spin and I'm singing

Doo, doo dookie taken on my side door

Somebody's been shootin' heroin, and spraying out their ass
Looked for corn or sign of nutrition in the poop 'round
Guy needs some protein if he wants to be alive

Doo, doo dookie taken on my side door

If Cenmusa builds a public toilet for the man
I will leave some quarters right on the ground
Doo, doo, doo
He can even use toilet paper, no public spy

Doo, doo dookie taken on my side door

And that's all I've got. Time for bed.